Steve and Michelle have been married for over 20 years, and they live in Minnesota. Steve Lutz is a psychologist at Counseling Care in the Woodbury area and has been in the field for more than 30 years. He specializes in working with married couples, families, and pastors. Michelle Lutz is a professor at the University of Northwestern in St. Paul and has been teaching for over 25 years. She specializes in teaching English, education, debate, and speech communications. She is also a relationship coach who helps empower women to boldly walk out their callings, create new, positive habits, and strengthen themselves and their relationships. Together, Steve and Michelle coach couples and lead marriage conferences; through these venues, they are able to help transform broken relationships into loving, life-fulfilling connections. All of this is possible because of God's wisdom, love, grace, and guidance.

Years ago, they attended a Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work weekend seminar in Chicago, based on Dr. John Gottman’s book The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work. At the time, their twins were toddlers, and as a couple, they often found themselves at odds. They deeply loved each other and their girls, and while there were many joyful moments, their relationship had begun to swing between highs and lows. Some days felt easy and connected, but it didn’t take much for one of them to get triggered. Arguments became more frequent, they stopped prioritizing each other, and both felt increasingly misunderstood and disconnected.

During the Seven Principles Conference, they learned practical skills for managing conflict and listening to each other more effectively. They discovered new ways to strengthen their bond and began healing from some of the pain in their past. They left the seminar with a renewed sense of hope and tangible strategies to help them prioritize their connection.

The experience was so impactful that they decided to share what they had learned with other couples. In 2017, they traveled to Seattle for training and earned their Seven Principles Leader certifications. Soon after, they launched Real Connection, their speaking and coaching business dedicated to helping others build happier, healthier, and more God-centered relationships. Their mission is simple: to help couples get real—while staying connected.

 

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